Out of reach
We all live under the same sky but why? why the grass is always greener on the other side.
I woke up this morning, after the end of the night, i could drank a case of you. I take a shower, the water hot anyway. So as i laid listening to the music, i wasn’t wondering if all was right. I remember the dream i was having, is gone. So, i open my window and breathing in the deep vapour trail of a cigarrette. I’m learning, learning to understand my loneliness and how it stems from the hollow. I thought we’d speak again, but now i’m just clutching a landline with the dial tone at your end. You miss that colour do you? but now everything is gray babe, the colours aren’t bright anymore. The graffiti which was once so radiant, is now behind layers of black and white, withering away as no one is retouching it. And i was looking for something in the depths of my own despair, to stand alone on this street or not. I was thinking about many things, through time has nothing to do with love, i’m questioning myself, are we really in love, can we loved? and be loved? or is it another comforting lie we hold to?
accepting that rain wasn’t an omen of bringing you back. It hurt her so bad, that she didn’t know what to say, she just smiled with tears in her eye infront of her favorite cartoon show. The sound of your voice close enough to bring this tears. My love, i can’t run away with you, i must run away from you and set myself free.
Why do the things that aren’t really love, still feel like love to us?
I lost my sweetness darling, i’m lack of this things. Did i ever tell you? our grave would be so beautiful with those roses u painted it black. Now ask me how i get here, ask me how i changed, how long does it take my smile to turn into sadness. I smoke again, fills the air making it hard to breathe, i look up to the sky there’s no rainbow over the gray sky. So then there will be no sweet charming prince on a white horse racing to come and save you.
We kiss like we are the only one alive, and then life gets in the way realizing we don’t fit to each other. Begged you to not leave me…begged you to stay every night, but i was the one running away. Because u no good to me babe in a long run. Sometimes I wish I could be someone that I’m not, dyed myself with colourful paints. Frame by frame, watching it again and again. Maybe it wasn’t the time to be warm, it was time to seek the fire.
Here i am on christmas day, holding on into the past year, the year i finally survive and found out that people always walking… they never staying in place. So many tear stained pillow cases hate scars on my body. I lost my faith, lost my way, i am in pain in such pain. I cry in my bed covered up with my blanket, alone, guess the world just don’t care about what we do. Eyes hollow and head full of pressure, the memory’s of you linger on…where did all the good times go?
when recovery seems so far away and no one understand,
I hope you remember this December how it finally rained. While heaven does not look so distant when you’re one step away.
